Ode to Hatred...

I hate them...people have strong reservations for the word "hate"...even my school teacher for English had...but I love to use it as much as I use the word "love"...if people can "love" icecreams, they can also "hate" mash-kolai daal with fish flesh and bones...one doesn't necessarily go and ban the preparation of such ghastly dishes...(doesn't ghastly sound nice for a word???see, that's what am saying..."hate" is also a nice word to use)...

So where was I? Aah, about HATING them...heh...wait I will list the reasons why I hate them with numbered points...in the process I will myself be crystal clear about why I hate them so much...and so would you, ye precious readers! Here we go:

1. One of them loves to come out almost naked after a bath and sits under the fan and basks in the thought that she might actually be entertaining the rest in the room while the fact is exactly the opposite...I mean, if I see a naked woman wearing only the bare minimum first thing in the morning, imagine the curses from me she is accumulating that may take it's toll on her marital life (no one really knows where and how Newton's Third Law works!)

2. The same one bathes herself with her perfume and is very proud of that...I like to imagine that I am sharing room with a live bottle of perfume...If Grenouille was here, he would have killed and waxed her am sure! Only that he would just do that for trial, not out of love for her body odour!

3. Bad accent! Apparently English is supposedly their first language, and they are horrible in it...no proper sentence structure, much worse for a casual spoken English...only Sulakshana's spoken English could be worse than their's...but even that's debatable!

4. Very bad taste in music...and on top of it can't appreciate my comprehensive breadth and width of taste in music...I was listening to Leonard Cohen and Ray Charles once, and one of them opined on them as "old" songs...so the "new" bland music they hear is very Britneyish or Enriquesque and it's annoying (one of the songs has no lyrics except "Baby")...(About "baby", more hatred on a different context, stay tuned)...they hate my rewaz, and I hate them infinitely for that!

5. Occupies the washroom as much as possible or impossible...not much hatred for that as long as I can pee, shit and shower whenever I want to...But I hate that they are so insecure about their washroom usage!

6. Switches off the light at 10:30 or 11ish pm and I cant even use my lovely focused yellow light for reading! The only book they read is The Forsaken Bible, and that too only one of them does (well before 10pm)...the other one has the same copy of the Unholy text, just keeps beside her pillow, never saw her reading it; that explains her nakedness after each bath perhaps! At other times during the day, the former one reads some stupid trashy celebrity magazine...bad taste in reading, okay that should go under the next point...

7. Bad and/or no taste in reading books...

8. If I am awake and the door bangs somehow because of a rainstorm or something late at night, they, in their sleep, think it is my doing...silly God-fearing idiots...

9. Keeps on badmouthing Islam whenever they can. At other times, only talk of food and boyfriend and bad weather. One of them takes the reality show "Emotional Attyachar" seriously.

10. One of them (the nakedness one) needs tubelight in broad daylight to finish her shorthand exercises...

11. Prefers coffee to tea...in this hot, humid Calcutta, loving coffee is like offering black cloaks to the members of the KKK. It's just not acceptable! Coffee, acceptable...but not coffee everday! But then, to each his own...at least they are not finding my flask of tea funny...

Okay I better end about my darned roomies and move to other pastures of hatred...Well, it seems, I have problem staying with anyone and everyone...Ideally, the fault is mine...it's a fact that people have problem with me...But then, what the hell, I have no trouble living with myself!

I hate him...Short, stout and bad sense of humour...plus loves pets and encouraging and gifting my lover into keeping pets! I hate pets...I just dont relate to pets or their owners...And he also has animalesque sense of non-veg humour, which is quite revolting...and why does she have to call him "Baby"??? of all words, baby?! why why why?????? It seems I have all rights reserved to hate him and her...And anyway, she is very formal and artificial with me...tries in vain to wear a mask of goodness with a very evil smile this side of the earth, in front of me, but it all fades and the mask comes off very fast...has a huge inferiority complex...hence works hard to make herself look confident and hence superior, poor thing!

I love him...only if he would know...and enjoy my hatred towards all things above...then we could have been a nice gang of two! And gangs do finally go beyond their hatred and ride away into the wilderness!

I love wilderness...I think...I might hate the ants or bugs there, but that could be settled with Woodland shoes...reason why I can tolerate capitalism...